Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Why are rare coins valuable?

I have a very interesting friend. He's top notch. But, he asked me this question and I had to think about it a while.

"Why are rare coins valuable? Because they are rare. The answer is in the question."

Okay, he's a friend. He has his value set. If I disturb that with a better answer, am I being a friend?

If he's reading this, No. If I had another answer, sharing it would have been wrong.

So here's the counter question.

"Why is one teddy bear priceless to one child and just a toy to the rest of the world?"

And there would be the harmful answer. Anyone know that answer?

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Ebola! Five times more dangerous than Dick Cheney

As media savant Grayson Daughters said today, 'We' should be embarrassed when the hational 'news farms' cover Georgia's issues better than anyone in Georgia. The New York Times ebola coverage provided this information.

As [Emory]doctors and nurses there worked to keep desperately ill patients alive in August, the county threatened to disconnect Emory from sewer lines if Ebola wastes went down the drain. The company that hauled medical trash to the incinerator refused to take anything used on an Ebola patient unless it was sterilized first. Couriers would not drive the patients’ blood samples a few blocks away for testing at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. And pizza places would not deliver to staff members in any part of the hospital.

Since I'm not a serious blog, I'll compare sanitation with pizza and sandwiches.

When Emory had one (1) ebola patient, the pizza places stopped delivery services to staff members. Jimmy John's speedy services continued while local government wanted to cut off the water.

So much for the defenders of the Noble Cause, Bible thumping, Sunday morning compassion, and Southern manners.

No pizza for you! Said the pizza Nazi from Atlanta.

No water for you! Said Boss Hog.

No courage.

For all the talk and posturing about a New South or the merits of the Old South, when the jungle comes calling in Atlanta, Atlanta's finest invoke the basic laws of the jungle.

Friday, October 10, 2014

Governor Perry refuses to seal Texas border

This just in from Mars.

With ebola killing 100% of infected people in Texas, it is time to seal the border until the crisis passes. However long that might be.

Governor Pick Perry refuses to close the border to air travel. Seems Mr. Perry is not campaigning for President but needs to visit all 50 states between now and the Republican 2012 Convention.

He can't do that if he shuts the border to all travel.

With a death rate of 100%, Texas is the new ebola epidemic epicenter. Perry could become the new Typhoid Mary. Only Mary didn't have plans to destroy the Blue States.

If you're still alive to see Rick Perry running the remains of the country in 2013, don't cough up blood.

Deaton Creek Tennis Courts, Hall County Commission, and a Democratic Party Club?

There's a story in the Gainesville Times from the Hall County Commissioners meeting.

The subdivision, Deaton Creek, needs tennis court repairs. The county is responsible. There's a water line running under the damaged court. But, when the residents request repair, the All Red Republican Party County Commissioners delay the repairs.


Well, Deaton Creek has a Democrats Club. They sponsor forums for Democratic Candidates. They hold a monthly meeting. And, members of the subdivision worked to recall current Republican Commissioner, Craig Lutz.

Lutz claimed the recall was a personal attack. He harassed all the people involved. His wife confronted one of her neighbors with a how dare you sign a petition. Nice way for a teacher to act. Just walk over to a strangers house. Knock on the front door and start spewing hatred.

So Deaton Creek needs the tennis courts fixed.

Fat chance.

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Ebola patient dies in Texas.

Not meant to be funny.

Had this man died in another continent, say .... Africa, I'd know nothing about him, his family, or his life.

Now, for predicting how Fox will handle the news.

Ebola death rate hits 100%! Secret Obama Death Panel Pulled the plug. Eric Holder refuses to answer Congressional inquiries into Ebola mercy killings. Program known as Fast and Furious II. ISIL behind attack in Benghazi where US strain of ebola was stored. Obama's ebola cure hidden behind WMD in Iraq. Muslims immune to new strains of the virus. Congressional Republicans call for nuke strikes against Israel. Rick Perry marries gay man with a fever.

That should cover it.

My sympathies to all who lost a loved one today or any other day.

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Blond Army being organized by Fox News to fight ISIL, DWF's wanted

The International Policy Think Tank, also known as Fox News, has been organizing a mercenary army of women, 100% blonde.

Under Hair General Lauren Engles, the Blonde Army has already used the highest technology to confuse Liberal Idiots Educated and Successful (LIES). Bleach!

Despite warnings from the FDA and the UN, the chemical poison, stored in leaky glass bottles, figures in the coming full frontal assaults on the soon to be defeated thinking heads.

Speaking quietly through a bull horn, neighbors overheard plans to use legs and boots on the ground when confronting LIES.

"When Hair General says attack, you will throw bleach on your hair, flash your red nails, and smile. Smile, dammit! Show me your war face! The face you used to get your first husband!"

The army recruited cross dressing men from Lax Vegas as hand to hand combat instructors. Think about a divorced woman forced to spend a whole night in stilettos on a Lax Vegas street corner in head to head competition. Things will get ugly sooner rather than later.

From the high heeled mean streets of Lax recruits move into Waffle Houses and Hooters. Only officer grade Blondes get their training at Hooters. [Hooters has changed its name to Peaks after some trainees were exposed].

Waffle House has denied training women for combat.

"Yeah, some of our waitresses can dish it out, but we don't allow stilettos and mesh hoses types to handle silverware."

A tip to the general male population, until the Blonde Army deploys overseas, tip well and always maintain eye to eye contact.

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Shot to death by police

Here's my version of events.

Some one steals my car. I had it parked in my drive way. I never heard a thing. Slept right through it.

Report the theft to the police ...

A week later, I hear something in my drive way. Steps on my front porch. Luckily I'm sleeping in my 12 gauge pajamas. Waving my jammies in a threatening manner, I shout, Who goes there!?

Smith and Wesson answer with 16 body shots. I die on the floor of my own home. Killed by the police serving a no knock, shoot to kill warrant.

Turns out, the police say I'm a sleep walking drug dealer living a second life (which also ended after my conversation with Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson.)

The police toss my wife out of the bed and begin searching for my drug inventory, meth lab, and the million dollars in drug money I've hidden in my house.

Two days later, they call off the search. Two days. Did I say, two days. Yes, I did. Two days after I died on the floor of my home, the police stop tearing my home apart.

They didn't find a thing.

My family grieves. They can't bury me in my own clothes because the police seized everything in the search. My surviving wife doesn't have her own clothes to wear to the funeral.

And, the police have what to say? Nothing. By the way, felons have a right to carry guns in Georgia but homeowners don't have a right to carry in their homes.

Read the article.

Let's see how this chicken processing idea works.

So, we grow the chickens and kill them. Freeze or refrigerate it. Pack it. Inventory it. Load it in containers. Put the containers on ships. Inventory it. Transport it through the Panama Canal paying fees. Cross the Pacific Ocean. Pay to dock. Unload. Inventory. Unpack the containers. Organize and process. Re-pack and re-label. Inventory it. Load into containers. Load containers onto ship. Inventory it. Cross the Pacific Ocean, again. Pass through the Canal paying fees again. Pay to dock in the US. Unload and inventory. Ship to distribution centers. Inventory. Store at proper temps. Sell. Ship to stores. Then, we pay the fuel bills, shipping crew, cargo hands, dispose of all the used packaging material. ---- and now we have chicken to eat. Well done, private enterprise.

I don't have a problem with any of that. It's basic outsourcing 101. Labor is cheaper in China. There are no regulations on processing chicken overseas. There's no workers comp, no pensions, and no unemployment. We can even hire 12 year old virgins to handle the chicken.

China gets jobs. They get chicken guts, beaks, and feet. Well, they get to visit with the guts, beaks, and feet before grinding it into McDonald's chicken nuggets. They get used plastic and cardboard boxes plus a chance for Ebola from the Liberian ship's crew.

It's a win win for everyone including the world traveling chicken.

Thursday, October 2, 2014

Obama decoys on Sale in Arizona

In a press conference this morning, the White House Spokesmodel revealed the biggest of all our state secrets.

The White House has 71 full size Obama decoys, some animated.

"It's our last line of defense should an individual jump the fence, get past the outer perimeter of Secret Service and dogs, enter the building through a door or a window. We'll done extensive computer modeling. Any would be assassin would be single minded. If he or she killed one of the decoys, they would stop.

"We tried to expanded the program to Vice President Biden with just two decoys. It took six weeks to find the VP. He was at home on the sofa watching reruns of the West Wing. Seems he had entered the White House and found himself. The psychological shock of finding self awareness late in life was too much for him. He remains under care leaving us with one Biden Decoy in the White House and another on tour."

Within 4 hours of the announcement, Markie's Sporting Goods and Full Auto Weapon Sales in downtown Arizone began selling Obama decoys by the dozen. The full size dozen costs $199 and the Magnum Lite Carry is available for $299.

Markie told reporters, "No, we're not trying to attract Obama into an ambush. We think we can attract Democratic voters into an ambush."

The National Society of GOP Lovers has 2 million full sized decoys on order for election day delivery.

"We're going to turn this country around by putting Obama decoys outside of polling places. The Obama faithful will be too busy bowing to their Gawd to vote. This is plan. It will work. Wait and see."

All of the above or most of it was stolen from some other writer. Like President Donald Duck Reagan, I forgot who.

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Southern intelligence in Cartoon form

“What’s it all about boy, elucidate!”

“He’s so dumb he thinks a Mexican border pays rent”

“Kid don’t quit talkin’ so much he’ll get his tongue sunburned”

“The snow, I say the snow’s so deep the farmers have to jack up the cows so they can milk’em”