Sunday, November 12, 2017

Representative Dunahoo

It speaks but who really wrote this editorial?

So ... Georgia's values are completely out of step with the rest of the country and most of the world.

And, that's a damn good thing says one of the Republican idiots representing Hall County in the State Legislature.

Yup. We need two Confederate holidays a year. Three more statues to Lee, Jackson, and Davis carved into the back side of Stone Mountain. We must support Judge Roy Moore the pedophile before a Democrat destroys God! We must not let poverty become a metric for providing healthcare because the poor should just die! And, we've added five Commandments to the Ten proposed by Moses. [The ones by Moses were just suggestions] We have assault rifles in elementary schools locked in cabinets because our active shooter policy remains Shelter in Place but the Gun Store needed sales. We have designed housing codes which outlaw Tiny Houses because we already have trailers.

So when will the rest of the country catch up to us and draft a Religious Liberty Law?

I rate him a 9.5 on the GOP scale of Tool.

Sunday, October 8, 2017

Vegas Conspiracy Theory

Here's what I've heard really happened in Vegas.

A group of ISIS terrorists traveled from Iraq on fake Israeli passports, brought machine guns with them through customs with help from the CIA and Facebook, walked through a casino with the guns and ammo without anyone noticing, rented a dozen rooms, blew the windows out with plastic explosives, used tracers rounds in the darkness to target country music haters, after kidnapping a real estate millionaire with huge gambling debts to the Italian mob, and after eating room service pork BBQ ribs, and having sex with under aged male prostitutes, and not tipping room service.

They all escaped by hiding behind the slot machines being operated by blue hair old ladies on fixed incomes. Sadly, the terrorists are trapped there until the ladies leave. That's when the pink elephants dance on the craps tables. As soon as that happens, the terrorists escape by walking backwards out the casino doors and into a waiting stretched Humvee limo with hot tub.

Does that pretty much cover it?

Monday, October 2, 2017

The Gun Store Incident

After the Vegas disaster pushed the hurricane disasters off the front page, my hatred of guns returned.

So I went down to the local gun store. Got in line and listened to all the reasons for buying a gun.

'My wife said I could have a butter knife or a Glock. She didn't care if a spread butter or blood. She said, 'Just get off the sofa and do something with your life. So, I'll take the Glock with the bayonet mounting rail.'

'I spent the weekend shopping for a new truck. The bank turned me down for the $51,000 loan. If I can't have a real man's truck, I'm getting the AR with that round, drum magazine, and a case of bullets. Do you have in house financing?'

'Plasma rifle with a 40 watt range.' Sorry, fella. What you see is what you get. 'SUV with a cow catcher bumper.'

'My wife said I could have a blow job for my birthday but I just can't wait.'

'He said his Ford was faster than my Chevy. So I raced him, title for title. Now that I'm walking, I'll need a gun to catch his ass.'

Monday, September 18, 2017

Fairness in the Proposed Georgia Sales Tax Plan

The proposal requires elimination of the income tax and dependency on collection of a state sales tax. The supporters and authors proclaim a consumption based tax as more fair to everyone than an income tax.

So let's tax everyone in the same manner, for fairness reasons.

So, it's fair to tax a college student, married with a child, working part time in the school library, in the same way as a unmarried college graduate, working their first post graduate job in their chosen field of study.

So, it's fair to tax my aging, gray haired Mother, living on that legendary fixed income, in the same way as the 40 something cardiologist who performed my Mother's by pass surgery.

So it's fair, to tax the single mom who dropped out of high school to give birth to a baby, conceived by incest or rape, in the same way as the father of the child, who denied the crime, escaped justice by calling the under-aged mother a slut, a whore, and a liar with the help of a public defender, appointed by the court and an all male jury?

As said more eloquently by so many others, life isn't fair. The governments must tax and spend, based on solid goals to address the unfair nature, not of life which cannot be legislated, but of income and position within unfair and unequal social and economic systems.

Saturday, September 16, 2017

The Republican Myth Promoting Corporate Leaders as Satisfactory Presidents.

Using only my personal observations of the individuals winning through the business based selection process for ultimate leadership of large international corporations, no one meets the leadership needs of a large nation.

A nation or government exists for the long term with infinite goals based on vastly variable perceptions and realities. In our case, we have 50 states, four or more time zones, an unknown number of dialects, and living conditions from homeless urban to selfish, internationally rich.

A corporation, serves itself, often the self gets described as 'stock holders.' Few accredit executive leadership as de facto ownership. That ownership, given stock options and bonus and perks, demands the label, Ownership.

And, the ascent to the Ownership leader position kills off internal competition. Much like the palace intrigues of Royal 'cousins' and would be heirs to thrones. In that process, some see politics. But, a failed presidential candidate like John McCain remains a post election power. No corporate winner would allow that.

Corporate leadership assumes short term tenures forcing short term goals.

No country, founded on rejection of unrepresentative government, should consider any corporate leader, as I have described them, as a viable candidate for control of the world's future.

Monday, August 21, 2017

Congressman Doug Collins service in Iraq

From the official website of Congressman Doug Collins:

"In 2002, Doug joined the United States Air Force Reserve as a chaplain. He ministered to service members both at home and at Balad Air Force Base in Iraq, completing a combat tour in 2009."

Aside from his service as a pastor, state representative, and now United States Congressman, Doug has ministered to members of our military as a chaplain in the Air Force Reserve since 2002. In 2008, he served a combat tour stationed at Balad Air Force Base in Iraq.

Hmmm. What does a lawyer really do in a combat tour on the safest base in Iraq?

From Global Security:

There was a Subway sandwich shop, a Pizza Hut, a Popeye's, a 24-hour Burger King, 2 post exchanges (PXs) that sold an impressive array of goods, 4 mess halls, a minature golf course, and a hospital. The base had a strictly enforced on-base speed limit of 10 miles per hour.

Must be rough on a base with 'a movie theater, two base PX's, fast food courts including Popeyes, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell, Burger King, Green Beans Coffee, dance lessons, an olympic size swimming pool, and an indoor swimming pool.' And the constant threat of visiting celebrities and politicians including Carrie Underwood in December 2006 and Gary Sinise.

Wonder if My Congressman got to meet Carrie or Gary?

"As of May 2004 the base had 17,000 troops and was 12 1/2 miles in circumference. General John Abizaid, commander of US Central Command, told the House Armed Services Committee in March 2004 that '. . . we are making Balad Airfield our primary hub in the region, and the idea of doing that is because we need to have the Baghdad International Airport revert to civilian control.'"

So Dear Dougie, during your combat mission in Irag inside a base 12 1/2 miles in circumference with fast food, celebrities, and an olympic sized outdoor pool, what were your daily duties as chaplain?

Did you go on convoy missions exposing yourself to enemy fire while maintaining the 10 mile per hour speed limit?

Did you ever fracken leave the base? Did you monitor the life guards? Did you share the foot holes and risk death just like the 8,000 civilian employees?

Tell us, Dear Dougie, what did you do in your combat tour of Iraq besides caplaining?

This is a repost. Here's some new information:

In 2007, Tony Blair begins withdrawal of UK forces.

Picture of Balad



Casualty list for Iraq War

Picture showing Bush May of 2003 "Mission Accomplished"



Article from Stars and Stripes on the dangers in 2004 from mortars at Balad

From 2007, Iraqi Parliament members request a withdrawal time table from US, an article from Fox News

From the US Army on Afghanistan and Iraq after 10 years. The war is costing $12 billion per month. In 2007, deaths in Iraq from all causes total 903. In 2008, 213 deaths.

Note on Deaths: OPERATION IRAQI FREEDOM includes casualties that occurred between March 19, 2003, and August
31, 2010, in the Arabian Sea, Bahrain, Gulf of Aden, Gulf of Oman, Iraq, Kuwait, Oman, Persian Gulf,
Qatar, Red Sea, Saudi Arabia, and United Arab Emirates. Prior to March 19, 2003, casualties in these
countries were considered OEF.

Another link

And, so you don't think that I think it was easy for those who fought.

Wednesday, August 2, 2017

M13 Gang Members arrested at High School --- see Photo !!!!

FoxNews brings us another success story of Republican President Donald Trump's War on M13 complete with pictures of those arrested!

This story proves the fake news, CNN, MNABC, and Alphabet Spews, mislead the American public on the dangers of illegal immigrants and their gang loving children.

Based on Long Island, illegal 'Mexican' rapists and their bastard children have been living under the eyes of police and school authorities until a student wore her clearly gang uniform to school, a Chicago Bulls jersey! The 17 year old, born in the back of a illegal Uber taxi driven by an underground member of ISIS, radicalized in Amen, chanted, "Yankees suck!" as police tazed her until the batteries died.

She is the third tatoo'd man on the left in the photograph below.


As real Americans, born on this Sacred Soil, we must pray for Donald Trump and his Christian mission to rid our country of brown Catholics, Mexicans, and potential gang members with Facebook pages.

Amen

Thursday, July 20, 2017

To Senator John McCain, a Humble Suggestion

As death approaches, many will recalls your military service, your years as a POW, and your time in Washington representing the people as the Senator from Arizona.

If that is not enough of a legacy, I suggest one more service.

Document your illness, the medical care, the emotional pain, and the expensive care.

I'm proposing a reality show unlike any of the current self promoting programs popular with couch potatoes.

Let your doctors detail the expected progress of the disease. Make live broadcasts of every medical treatment. Share pictures of the tumor and blood clot. Leave no moment untold.

Let your doctors detail the expected progress of the disease. Make live broadcasts of every medical treatment. Share pictures of the tumor and blood clot.

Speak through a camera to all of us who have and have not watched cancer as it kills.

Open your medical bills live. Let your emotions show as you tally in dollars what it costs to die in America.

As the Healthcare debate burns other more Partisan Republicans, be for us, one more time, a man of courage and transparency.

That would be a legacy I'd envy.

Putin Attacked by Fidget Spinners. Bombs Ball Bearing Factories in Georgia.

Russian Separatists attacked Putin in a failed assassination attempt yesterday. Using fidget spinners in the first militarization of the harmless toys, Two men, disguised as street vendors, stopped a motorcade containing 700 personal trainers, a horse, and Putin.

The would be assassins twirled multiple spinners in the newest display of martial arts which immobilized the 700 personal trainers and alledged froze Putin.

Putin's horse, also in the motorcade, immediately recognized the danger. After kicking its way out of the gilded animal trailer, it charged the assassins, scattering the men and their deadly spinners.

Freed from the spin induced coma, the 700 personal trainers, in a rare public display of Russian Flash Mob, the trainers quickly formed a phalanx, singing Thriller.



A Western Journalist captured the Flash Mob on video.

This is the only evidence of the failed assassination.

According to a Russian press release three hours later, 7 bearing factories exploded in China and India.

Unrelated story on Putin and fidget spinners.

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Australian Ambassador demands meeting with Trump

Minnesota police shot an Australian citizen to death without probable cause.

They didn't have their body cams turned on ... or they erased them.

She was 40 years old and wearing pajamas.

I hope this becomes an international incident. I hope the Australians expel the US Ambassador.

Don't you remember this? We are no better than North Korea in how our police operate.

Monday, July 17, 2017

New Body Cam Law Needed

Fresh news today.

Cops with body cams leave them turned off. Then, they shoot people to death.

Leaving the cam off should be a misdemeanor crime. Having no cam footage of a shooting should be a felony.

Both would have some pretty solid evident forcing a very short trial.

So, two new simple laws. Easy to enforce. High conviction rate.

And, obeying the law, which is just doing your job correctly, benefits everyone.

What say you?

Is it time for law enforcement to do a time for a crime?

Saturday, July 15, 2017

Secret Service logs for Trump Tower

Security requires screening access to parts of Trump Towers. Visitors must log in or register with Security. NYPD were involved in protecting that candidate.

Presidential candidates are offered Secret Service protections and the Secret Service fiercely guards against threats to candidates.

Threats. Even mail is screened.

So why haven't we seen a visitor list, provided by Security and the Secret Service, to document who visited Trump Tower?

That's another leak to be seen on a fake news headline tomorrow morning?

Maybe there's no record of secret meetings and the guests? Wouldn't that be more interesting?

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Putin meets Trump and then says ...

"You're a fucking idiot. I wish Hillary had won."

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Russian Revelations

Putin printed a new Chapter in the King Donald Bible, Russian Revelations.

Revelations 12.25.1 Never elect a President in a foreign country unless that country shares a contiguous border with Russia for those who would be leaders must be deceivers with a Fake Press.

Revelations 25.12.1 Repent before slaying your Enemies because you won't have time to eat the popcorn while they die.

Revelations 13.27.2 They blaspheme who in their works deny the past before the present falls behind tomorrow when a new email reality shall be first and last.

Revelations 72.9.1 When thee shyte gets real, make small lies for thy self must survive the Devil.

Sunday, July 9, 2017

Me at the G20 - Boda Bing. Boda Boom

[My apologies to those about to be offended]

It started slowly with me being mistaken for a Republican psychiatrist by the Secret Service. That's an easy mistake to make. I'm white, male, and exit mental health facilities by walking backwards.

So Homeland Security whips me off a street corner near the White House. I try to explain my motivations behind my blogs posts and that whole thing with the backpack in the public meeting. No one really seems to listen. Most of them have one hand covering an ear while talking to their jacket cuff, keeping that hand clenched.

So I sit back in the plush leather seat of the limo and focus on giving my captors the militant, 'I'll never talk' stare. I'm tough. I'm from Indiana and there's nothing but corn there. No body talks to the corn. I'm holding my own. Mentally I'm repeating the Hoosier secret mantra, "I am the rogue and the tassel."

They break me quickly, like a twig with the classic ploy, "Would you like some Dansani?"

That's who it works. Without thinking, I'm suddenly saying, "Yes." Yes to everything with a thoughtful, little Sure thrown in.

So, in the middle of my one worded conversation, which never touches on that backpack thing, Wrist Talker 3 throws a black bag over my head. My fate seems sealed. It's a rendition to a third world prison.

I don't see the point in the black hood. I can hear the planes landing and taking off. Just as I start mouth breathing, I smell jasim. Sweet. Calming. Sleep inducing. Coma causing, Jasim scented black bag gas. I'm out.

I dream of hands on my body. A tape measure sizing me up for an orange suit. I feel the little footies placed on my feet. My vision returns, blurry. The world seems to swim. I see my mirror image. Gods! I look like Ivanka Trump complete with a sleeveless dress. In this dream, Ivanka stands beside me, her image in the mirror. We look like twins! Who knew?

She says something to Wrist Talker 4 who wears sunglasses. "There's no fracken way I'll ever sit in a chair after Daddy has been sitting in it. Why can't someone else in the family go? How about Tommy the Tongue, or Louie the lip? What about you? You go. If this is the best body double, Republican psychiatrist on the planet, he's going in."

Two guys lift me to my feet and frog march me through a door. The lights are too bright but I see a fat man with an orange face rise from a chair. I'm thrust into the chair. The chair stinks. The seat feels wet on my butt. Maybe they should have added a girdle to my outfit. I smile but instantly, I'm challenged. Maybe in Italian.

"What the fuck is going on here? Who the fuck is this?"

I hear myself breaking the deadly silence, "My name is Ben Sobel... -lioni. Ben Sobellioni. I'm also known as, uh, Benny the Groin, Sammy the Schnazz, Elmer the Fudd, Tubby the Tuba, and once as Miss Phyllis Levine."

Someone coughs. I hear the whispers. "It's Trump's daughter."

The blond guy with no shirt mutters in a bad Russian accent, "Bitch."

I give him the Hoosier stare and say, "Now is that polite? Is that nice? I'm tryin' to be nice over here. Do I go up to you and say, 'Hey, you're so-and-so, the Hard-On?'"

I hear some German woman shouting. There's a magic voice in my ear, translating. "What qualifies her to sit at this table. What does she know about world events?"

"I know 1957 was a big year. The Russians put that Sputnik into outer space, the Dodgers played their last game at Ebbets Field to say goodbye to Brooklyn, that guy shot Frank Costello in the head, and missed, and the Gallo brothers whacked Albert Anastasia in the barber shop of the Sheraton View hotel. It was total chaos. With Anastasia out of the way, Vito Genovese figures he's the big boss. But Carlo Gambino and Joe Bananas, they had other ideas. So they called a meeting. A big meeting. Huge! Bigly!"

Into the silent pause, I hear a Canadian voice. Or, what I think is a Canadian voice. In my peripheral vision, I see a good looking man, charming, well dressed. He smiles as he talks.

"Yes. Those are the bonafides we all expect, perhaps demand, for a Trump begat woman, raised in the filth of New York City, denied access to fresh air and the opportunity for good healthcare access."

A conversation starts at the far end of the table. The German woman asks me about the sleeveless dress. A Russian voice asks for more vodka. I smile at the world's leaders. I know where I am. This is the G20 meeting or the G20 minus One. Through the Jasmine haze, I remember who I am. The world stage beckons my Liberal voice, I cry out, "Covfefe!"

They ignore me.

Defeated, even in this dream world, I excuse myself. Wrist Talker 5 helps me from my chair. I rise with a wet butt but the chair had dried. The room smells better. Hands guide me through the door. The Ivanka Trump image confronts me.

"You talk to anyone about this you ... you motherfucker I'll fuckin' cut your fuckin' balls off I'll shove them up your fuckin' ass, I'll fuckin' bury you, I'll put fuckin' ice picks in your eyes, I'll chop your fuckin' eyeballs, I'll send them to your fuckin' family so they can eat 'em for dessert. You understand me?"

"You don't hear the word No a lot, do you?"

"Yeah. I hear it all the time but it's more like, 'No. Please. No.' So here's what I think you're going to do. See Wrist Talker 6? I would do whatever he says. If he wants you to talk, talk. I would get on all fours and bark like a dog. I would do whatever it takes. Smoke some joints! Drink some wine! Whatever it is, ... Where could you run? This is the time to be happy! Life is just too short!"

The world goes black and Jasmine tickles my nose. I wake up on a bench in Lafayette Park. My butt is still wet. The blonde wig slipped to one side. The Jasmine smells like piss. There's a taxi driver waving to he. I struggle over to his cab and lean in the window.

"Don't worry about it," He says. "Happens about once a month. Some straight white dressed like Ivanka Trump, sitting on that bench. Tourists used to take pictures of them. Once the D.C. police arrested one. Nothing happens."

I stutter, "W w what should I do?"

"Don't worry about it. Get in the cab. I'll drop you at a bar. Have a few drinks. And, next time ... ask for the girdle."

My apologies to Paul Vitti and Analyze This.

Saturday, July 8, 2017

Is Open Carry the new White Sheet.

I'm not a fan of Open Carry. I'm no fan of concealed carry or Stand Your Ground laws.

If someone feels the need to carry a gun for self protection, Fine. Let them and their actions stand an objective test and not be enabled by NRA like lobbyists.

So, I feel no surprise when the KKK in Virginia, home to former slave owner and Confederate General, Robert E. Lee, plans a public display of weapons in 'peaceful protests.'

The KKK and Peace Protests. I have never attended a KKK rally, complete with a Fiery Cross, White Hoods, Confederate symbols, and a Grand Dragon. Those events might have been urban legends but I don't think so. I'm sure those were held, sometimes in public places, with more than a little fiery violence. For all I know, they also rallied in public parks to stage lynching and fried chicken eating contests.

Now, I know where to go for a peaceful KKK rally and protest, if protest is the right word for intimidation.

Charlotteville, Virginia.

Here's a noble quote from one of the Knights, “It’s an open-carry state, so our members will be armed,” said James Moore, a member of the Loyal White Knights of the Ku Klux Klan."

So what purpose to this peaceful rally if not to intimidate or incite violence? Well, let's ask.

“The liberals are taking away our heritage,” Moore said. “By taking these monuments away, that’s what they’re working on. They’re trying to erase the white culture right out of the history books.”

Or, maybe I should restate the press release type of boilerplate message. "The KKK is protesting the Charlottesville City Council’s decision this year to remove a statue of Confederate Gen. Robert E. Lee from a public park and rename that park."

So which should we believe? Peaceful protest or the new version of Lynching on the Square.

Tomorrow's news? Open Carry is the New White Sheet.

Thursday, July 6, 2017

Guns don't kill. People kill. Well, except for when ...

I played with guns as a kid. Real guns. Unloaded. Loaded. Rifles. Shotguns. Pistols, Fully automatic weapons.

I owned toy guns that looked just like the real thing including the Martian ray gun from the Bugs Bunny Cartoons.

So back to the title.

Guns don't kill. People kill.

Except for combat. Obviously. Humans made guns to kill more people faster during war. The butter knife has its purpose. The longer lasting light bulb shines brighter and longer. And, guns. Made to kill. But, if you want to argue that people kill, let's talk war. Again.

Barney Fife didn't fight in any wars and did just fine with one pistol bullet secured inside a buttoned shirt pocket. Today's military carries semi-auto weapons into combat. Mostly. But, dang, even a semi-auto pumps out death at a pretty high rate of speed compared to Barney's only bullet. In that shirt pocket. Closed with a button.

In combat, we can't have a buttoned down bullet delaying death. No. So our soldiers pop off a bunch of shots. Bombs, too. Seems like I've heard a rumor that our soldiers fire thousands of bullets without hitting or killing the enemy. So we miss a little. Okay, so we miss a lot.

Where do the misses go?

That's the mystery exception to Guns don't kill; People kill.

So unlike Barney's bloused bullet, Private Billy Blastoff pops off his thousand round quota in a combat zone and hits a few civilians. Now, he didn't mean to do it. No one calls it murder. No Patriot anyway. Nope. So how did it happen if a human didn't intend for it to happen?

Well, the gun did it. A perfectly normal thing that soldiers call, collateral damage. Sargent Carter didn't order Private Pyle to blast Baghdad Betty and her baby. The gun did it. Has to be the gun. Must be the gun. Can't be anything else.

Cause when a baby gets shot, through an apartment wall in a city like Chicago, it was a bad guy who did. The wrong kind of person to own a gun.

In combat, it was the gun. Unless we want to be ethical and call it murder. The wrong kind of person with a gun. A bad guy.

Here's my point, the gun doesn't care who owns, who points it, or who dies. It just kills. Humans provide the labels depending on philosophy.

Back when I was a kid, playing with real and toy guns, I knew that only the bad guys died and the good guys always won. Now, I'm grown the my Martian death ray retired. I know what others deny. Guns kill innocent people despite the platitudes and philosophies.

Friday, June 30, 2017

The real President of the United States.

"With Malice towards none, with Charity towards all."

These were the words of the First Republican President after 48 months of war, after being called a traitor, a murderer, the Black Republican, jackass, imbecile, the Illinois ape, and a baboon by the enemies who would kill him.

"I heard poorly rated Morning Joe speaks badly of me (don't watch anymore). Then how come low I.Q. Mike, along with Psycho Joe ... "

The words of perhaps the last Republican President after a television segment. With these and other words, we have discussed his fitness for the office. Now we should discuss how he is fit for removal from that office.

But, we cannot yet pardon him by removal. We must, before before pardon, continue the many investigations in collusion with Russia to determine the legitimacy of Trump, Pence, and the whole administration.

I remember the Nixon pardon ending the Watergate investigation. I remember how the Iran/Contra investigations ended when a Republican President gave pardons to former Cabinet members convicted and to others facing trial I will not have my children and grandchildren remember how we looked away from the harsh, post election accusations of Russia selecting the winner of the 2016 Elections.

Just as Lincoln sought a moral right and a godly justice, we must, like him, seek an end to mindless conflict, character attacks, and illegitimate government.

Trump begs for removal from office. Let the hand of Justice remove him, not the partisan expediency of politicians.

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

You never hear it coming

Remember the episode on M.A.S.H. when Hawkeye reunites with an old friend who enlisted in the Army so he could write a book about War?

The title for the proposed book was, "You never hear it coming." That happy episode? Sometimes you hear the bullet.

Parents. You're never going to hear the bullet that kills your child. They play with your loaded guns when you're not around. Maybe you'll hear a dull thud like sound. But, the bullet will tear through that little body faster than the speed of sound. They won't hear the bullet but they will feel the burning gasses, the hellish bullet tearing flesh, and the thunder clap shock wave forming a cavitation chamber.

Cavitation chamber. The bullet causes the body's liquids to form gasses as it crushes through flesh. The cavity closes at least part way after the shot. Never all the way. The forensic pathologist knows. As soon as the file opens.

GSW, Through and Through path, front to back, 12 year old child, male, DOA ...

Over 1300 times a year. Once is too often. Even if it's not your child.

Remember, there are two rules in the Gun Control Debate.
Rule Number One, 1300 children die per year from gunshot wounds.

Rule Number Two, Doctors can't change Rule Number One.




Karen Handel graduates high school. Secret up gown pictures found on Jon Ossoff shoes.

Robbie, the Friendly Opinion Bot, shared my morning coffee. Gosh, he's a great bot. Always polite and as well mannered as a modern Rhett Butler.

After he poured me a second cup of my homemade covfefe latte, he got quiet then asked me in that smooth contralto bot voice, 'What's been bothering you, Mike?'
LIke a good penitent, I confessed, 'My news feed seems thinner than the feed all my friends get."

Robbie waved his arms and I thought he was going to say, "Warning, Will Robinson!" Finally, he retracted those lovable arms and said, "You're not getting out as much as your friends. It's narrowing your bot interactions. Go visit the wireless at a high end coffee house. Maybe get some food at a convenient, chain restaurant with free wireless in the dining area. No more drive-thru, Mike. Go inside and meet the other bots. I can't give you all the fake news all by myself."


I knew I was going to recover when I heard Robbie say,

"'Ship my pants? Right here? Ship my pants, you're kidding,' the man says.
'You can ship you pants right here," the Kmart worker says.'"

Robbie new there's nothing like a retail commercial linking Big Gas and box stores to get my attention before refreshing my news feed with subliminal messages to make me feel happy as I borrow money from China to make my campaign contributions to 6th District Karen Handel.

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Because we're not getting screwed enough

Human sexual desire explained using porn search terms.

PornHub

2007 | Year of MILF

2008 | I won't post that title

2009 | Watch your Neighbors

2010 | Let your neighbors watch you

2011 | Sexual Addictions

2012 | Betty or Veronica

2013 | Is this an election year

2014 | The Year of Belle Knox

2015 | Sex on the Step Master

2016 | Planning for Retirement

2017 | Must we again

Friday, June 16, 2017

I can't stop

List of abortion related killings

In 1993, Michael F. Griffin shot Dr. David Gunn to death during a protest.

In 1994, Paul Jennings Hill shot Dr. John Britton and clinic escort James Barrett to death, also wounding Barrett's wife.

John Salvi shot and killed two receptionists, Shannon Lowney and Lee Ann Nichols.

Eric Robert Rudolph bombed the 1996 Olympic Games in Atlanta in protest of abortion, killing one person and wounding 111, and bombed several abortion clinics in 1997 and 1998, killing a security guard and critically injuring a nurse.

In 1998, James Kopp shot a number of abortion providers, killing one, Dr. Barnett Slepian.

In 2009, Scott Roeder shot and killed Dr. George Tiller. Tiller served as an usher at church; he had previously been a target in 1993, when he was shot by Shelley Shannon.

In 2015, Robert Lewis Dear, a 57 years-old Kentucky born, moved from South Carolina to North Carolina to Colorado where he opened fire on a Planned Parenthood facility, killing two civilians and a police officer. After a five-hour standoff Dear told the police "no more baby parts."[5] Robert Lewis Dear has been found to be mentally incompetent to stand trial.

I feel dirty.

These are a few pictures of the dead, places where right wing killers killed, and the blood in the streets from politically motivated murderers.

Terrorist killings.

I feel dirty after searching the internet for these pictures.

I don't blame Newt, Trump, or the third nut on the Right.

I blame real people. Real people. Real guns. Real deaths.

For the pictures of crime against humanity, look down. Look down.







Thursday, June 15, 2017

Video transcript of ball park shooting emerges

"Shoot him!"

"Shoot him!"

"Blow his head off!"

Yes, real words from a real tape made during the Baseball Mass Shooting.

Who said it?

Could have been two boys or two girls or a boy and a girl, sitting in the bleachers playing a first person shooter game over a wireless connection.

But, it wasn't.

As the shooting progressed into a fire fight between the 2nd Amendment shooter and the armed Congressional guards, a man plainly screams, "Blow his head off!"

That can be heard about 4 minutes into this video.

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Washington shooter related to George Washington

In the bazaar of reality, my blog gets a zero today.

Abner Doubleday was not involved in the Lincoln assassination but a direct descendant of George Washington just shot 9 men wearing black socks over a diamond. With rubber bands and a homemade rubber band gun.

Five maids a milking watched as a former Combat Surgeon, named Hawkeye after a famous native American, rubbed dirt into the wounds and advised the victims to, 'Walk it off.'

I have been damned to Hell, again, for thinking about maybe discussing these things so soon after such a tragic event. Mine Godt! They haven't even picked up all the rubber bands yet! Have some decency man!

According to Paul, who saw the whole thing from the top dugout step, the off duty Meter maids, armed with bananas, saved an untold number of batting gloves. They also ripped the rubber band gun from the teeth of the assailant who was willing to give up his eye teeth for the Right to Bear Arms.

Seriously, why can't we discuss gun control today? It's not because the victims and the victim's family deserve a quiet time for grief.

We could never discuss cancer cures if we waited for a cancer free day to initiate research.

Chris Barnard would be transplanting dog hearts for a secret society.

And, the Iron Lung manufacturers would be blocking drug research.

All medical science would stop.

If we waited for the perfect day ...

There's no perfect time. What we did not discuss yesterday, killed people today. It is our shame that any human would ban science to protect ignorance.

We must discuss today for the benefit of tomorrow.

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

What does it mean?

"[T]he suggestion that I participated in any collusion — that I was aware of any collusion with the Russian government to hurt this country, which I have served with honor for 35 years, or to undermine the integrity of our democratic process, is an appalling and detestable lie,” he said.

What does that mean? It means maybe nothing coming from me. But, let's say, a former member of the Communist Party said it. Means nothing. No one should believe it.

So let's decide what it means to say hurt this country? Hmmm. A Republican could say that anything done to prevent Clinton from following that black guy as President would be a service to 'this country' and not a harm.

So, why not say, I did nothing to help the Russians determine the outcome of the 2016 Presidential Election. I know nothing of any other person or party working with any foreign agents to change the outcome of that election.

The second is a denial. I like strong denials.

The first is weaseling.

Might as well say, "I am not a crook!" Hmmm. Nixon. Watergate. Firings. Hmmm.

Jeff Sessions' Memory or memory loss

Not since President Ronald Reagan sold drugs to buy guns has the American public heard "I don't remember; in so many variations from a Republican.

I'm not worried about how Republicans would act if a Democrat used the Fog of Recall as an excuse.

I'm thinking, Who is going to take away his driver's license?

Civil War Theories and antebellum reasoning

I've experienced the Civil War first hand as a Damned Yankee who moved into Georgia back in the 1980's.

No, I did not get shot at unless I was shot at and missed. But, I've been broadsided with loose verbal cannons over the so called The Great Cause. Because 'you people' revised history.

Back on Damned Yankee. If you've never heard the term, Damned Yankee, it has a specific and unique Southern meaning. It's not about U.S. intervention in foreign nations or adobe walls painted with the slogan, 'Yankee go home!'

No, 'Yankees' are 'those people' from 'up north.' Robert E. Lee called the federal forces, 'those people.' So 'those people' became 'Yankees' over time. But, the 'damned' doesn't get added unless a 'Yankee' comes south for a vacation and stays. A Damned Yankee is one of 'those people' living next door.

So, soon after moving into the Atlanta Metro Area in 1986, a proud, Southern, Republican, woman called me a Damned Yankee and and explained it to me in the slow measured tones used to mask hatred and contempt.

So, I didn't fire the first verbal broadside, a proper lady fired first.

So, this 'Damned Yankee,' Me, gets to hear the many myths of Southern Heritage including the War of Northern Aggression, the Great Cause, and states rights as the overarching cause of our 'Civil War.'

I'm ranting as a proper Southerner from South Carolina politely revised these argument today. He planted as his source, the writing of a religious scholar responding to Timothy Egan's article in the New York Times.

As we politely mused aloud about the real cause of that unpleasantness, he asked me if maybe the North had a different reason for fighting than the South? Rather than answer yes or no, I played my Abraham Lincoln card. Well, there's no such thing as a card in any discussion but we'll talk about other types of fighting words another day.

Since Lincoln answered a lot of questions by telling 'homespun' stories, I made up my own story in reply to his question about why did the North fight since it had no slaves type of thing.

"Well, I knew this feller, who got himself into a fight and won. And, he did a pretty good job of winning as once a fight is started the only way to be sure of ending it is to win it. So after the fight, people asked him, 'Why did you whoop up on that feller?' My simple minded hero answered, 'Because he hit me first!'

What ever combination of reason drove the North in the Civil War, the South struck first to preserve, not slavery, but the right to breed human beings into life time and generational slavery based on race.

I don't know why we need to debate past the South's first punch.

Sunday, June 11, 2017

Dueling Campaign ads

How I see dueling political ads, using 'Mike Parker' as the candidate's name.

Mike Parker has brown hair.

No, Mike Parker is bald.

I'm Mike Parker and I have black hair.

I've seen Mike Parker and he has gray hair.

"I've never tried to hide my gray hair."

Mike Parker is a member of a Hair Club cult.

"I've never been a member of the Hair Club for Men."

They're all the same when it comes to hair!

He has hair on his back!

He protects the environment by not washing his hair.

He had hair before he didn't have hair!

"I could shave my head on Fifth Avenue and still get elected."

Hair is not an issue to me.

I don't care and I'm going to vote for him anyway.

I'll never vote for him!

"I'm Mike Parker and I paid for this mess."

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Senseless gun death. Girlfriend killed by graduation gift.

I hate posting this kind of stuff.

High school grad gets a gun as a reward. Wonderful award after 12 years of schooling. Nothing says, 'You're now a responsible member of a gun toting society" than a gun gift. I hope it was wrapped up in a coffin shaped box. They needed a coffin a few minutes later when 12 years of schooling proved not enough. Not enough.

Teen kills girlfriend

The story gets worse. His girlfriend, Lucina Luna, was shot in her own home. By her boyfriend. Who got a gun as a graduation gift. From her father.

Yes. 'I love you. Dad thinks you're great. Here's a gun for you. Now shoot me with it and seal our lives together. Forever.'

Saturday, June 3, 2017

Fake news that makes ya go spew

In fake news ...

Yesterday, Trump said that he would be honored to meet with Kim Jong Un. When asked why, Trump said, “Because I’ve heard her music, and she sounds beautiful.”

House Republicans are again trying to repeal and replace Obamacare, even though they don’t have the votes. House Republicans defended themselves and said, “Please, it’s a soothing ritual that comforts us.”

German Chancellor Angela Merkel says she is confident that fake news will not harm her chances in Germany’s election. In fact, Merkel is so confident she’s going to win, she’s not even going to campaign in Wisconsin.

Not fake news ...

Trump’s thinking the government should go on a break. How is this going to work? This is the federal government, not Ross and Rachel.

And, if you don't know Ross and Rachel ...

On Twitter this morning, Donald Trump suggested the U.S. needs a “good shutdown” to fix a deadlocked Congress. I don’t think Donald Trump realizes that the government is not like a computer. You can’t fix it by turning it off and turning it back on again.

Doesn't work with the Hostage Virus.

And, finally, for the sweet tooth in all of us,

A picture went viral of a man delivering a 30-gallon tub of Cinnabon frosting on a bus — or as we call him in my house, Santa Claus. You just know everyone on that bus was like, “Forget my stop, I’ve got to see how this ends.” 30 gallons — that’s enough for nearly two Cinnabons.

Thursday, May 18, 2017

Die! Die! At least 3 per hour!

I visited this site

I didn't like it.

Don't go there.

Don't go here, either.

This one is safe unless you let your kids play with your Big Boy Toys.

But, if you're into head wounds and have been banned from Reddit, this one's for you.

312 Cossacks and Counting

This week in blogging news, 312 Russian Cossacks have entered my blog. Three times as many Russians read my blog than Americans. The question which dumbfounds me is why do they visit a blog named North Georgia Democrats which has no affiliation with any political party?

Well, there was that post about Putin killing his gay lover. My sources, rather poor sources, claimed Putin went all Sharon Stone with an ice pick followed with a Silence of the Lambs dinner party with fava beans and a nice Vodka.

The story proved to be false. Putin did not kill his lover. His favorite butt buddy lives part time in New Jersey. Safe from the Russian grill. For now.

Then, I wrote that story about Putin and the Time Machine. Seriously, what would you do with a time machine if you were the Third Most Powerful Man in the World, with Obama being first and that Korean guy second? Would you meddle in the past or seek out future events? Most of us would travel forward but not a True Conservative. They would go meddle in the past.

So Putin traveled back and tried, over and over, to destroy the US. After 100's of trips, he destroyed the time machine. Someone heard him say, it works out better this way. Hold my beer.

Then, Marx met Lenin in the Pope's purgatory. It was a true story. But, dasvidaniya Comrades! I gave first billing to Marx who never killed 20 million people. Oh, that must have hurt.

So, I just don't know what could attract an audience in a totalitarian country. Shrug.

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

School shootings

Georgia has passed a law allowing guns in public schools.

Georgia also passed, some years ago, a ban on guns inside the Capital Building in downtown Atlanta.

Sadly, I read this very short story about a 7 year old being shot 'accidentally' in a public school. No details yet on who had the gun or why. No full reports on the injury to the child. The child could be dead.

So, if I can, I will report on guns in schools and children shot by parents, teachers, and other adults.

Because, guns don't kill. Parents, teachers, cops, firemen, adults, and students kill.

Saturday, May 13, 2017

Cyber attack

Hey, Buddy. Could I borrow $300 in Bitcoins?

The irony emerges in the recent international cyber attacks. The attacks lock up your computer demanding a ransom, $300 in Bitcoins.

So, with your computer frozen, how do you buy Bitcoins and pay the ransom?

And, the attacks allegedly originate with the USA's stolen software. I don't see how. Capitalism shines at collecting the 'coin.'

Had to be Putin's left elbow in this one.

Thursday, May 11, 2017

Putin gives Republican Party leaders Order of Lenin medals made of Fools Gold

Putin sent a dozen 'Order of Lenin' medals to the USA via FedEx. The Justice Department intercepted the package. The CIA refused to open and inspect the boxes. The package being on domestic soil, the job fell to the FBI.

Being smarter than a cat, the FBI refused to open the boxes saying, 'if we open the box, a cat dies. Nobody wants to kill a cat.'

A reporter shouting questions from the street corner nearest the potentially explosive boxes was arrested. Jelly Konrad, Republican leadership spokesperson denied any connection with the reporter's arrest. 'Yes,' she said, ' we know the reporter. He's a reporter. But, he wasn't reporting at the time of his arrest. This precludes the arrest from any violation of the reporting clause in the Constitution.'

Seance' Spicer twitted from under a rose bush that the reporter wasn't really a reporter because he wasn't reporting anything, just yelling about explosives. And, we can't have someone screaming bomb every time a box full of cats or maybe not full of cats is found by the Justice Department.

When asked why are there cats in the boxes, he repeated, 'There could be communist cats in the boxes. Maybe there aren't communist cats.'

While this exchange continued, a homeless man who looked a lot like Woody Harralson's dad, approached the boxes. Spectators, as no reporters could have been reporting what hadn't happened yet, said the man grabbed the boxes and began running down Pennsylvania Avenue.

Various reports by reporters reporting claimed the man had political motivations in stealing the boxes of cats that might not be in the boxes. Some heard him shout, "Wait 'til I get to the Grassy Knoll with this shit!"

A New England Patriot's linebacker who was not visiting the White House tackled the homeless man. That is when the boxes were dropped and broke open. The Capital police, the FBI, and Seance' Spicer threw their bodies over the broken boxes. Some reporters reported erroneously that Amy Shummer had been thrown onto the boxes. These reporters reported in a later report that it wasn't Amy. It was Melissa McCarthy.

Finally, a deep voice, perhaps that of a man speaking from the shadow filled area of the new parking garage said, 'It's not about pussy!'

We are awaiting a news Conference for pre-reporters at the Rose Garden. A preview of the topic confirms our worst fears.

'We cannot confirm or deny the existence of any communist cats at this time.'

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Latest Spicer Picture


Another view:

Trump order roses for himself

Republicans wouldn't send him candy. He gets no roses from the men he fucks. So, he has to buy his own.

From: Me

To: Me

Message: I love you.

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Noose tightens on Putin and Republicans

Troubled? Troubled!?

A CEO of a family corporation worth billions, makes a hundred grand doing a reality TV show based on the tag line, "You're fired."

The Republicans nominate that CEO and elects him President of the United States. And, when that CEO acts like the tyrant in a Hollywood movie about all that can go wrong in a Banana Republic, all you have to say,

"I feel a little troubled by the second firing of a top federal law enforcement officer involved in the investigation of Russian election interference and international Republican collusion to seize our government."

Read the quote about being troubled while watching Democracy being beaten to death.

Six Reasons Comey might have been fired.

My Six Reasons Comey was fired.

1. Under oath, Comey admitted to be nauseated by Republicans in the White House.
2. Insecure old fart in the White House has to sleep in his New Jersey doghouse because his Russian bride said, 'No way, Jose!'
3. Presidents can't fire comedians on Saturday Night Live.
4. There's a secret war in Cambodia where we are illegally fighting Godless Communists.
5. There were no alien ships or bodies in Area 51.
6. Putin said, "Kim Jong Un told me, you have a little dick and can't get it up without Science. And, Comey told me it was true!"

FBI Director James Comey

Trump has fired FBI Director James Comey

Source

Monday, May 8, 2017

Kill the deer now! Before the world ends.

I like this little essay.

Its Republican flavor goes well with fava beans and micro beer.


Yes, I channeled my inner Doctor Lecter. Because if we're really going to save the world, it won't help to eat Bambi.

No. We all need to unchain the basic survival instinct, Eat or be eaten.


Sunday, May 7, 2017

Putin

Alexander Putin ... visited my blog yesterday. Said he was from Russia.

Right.

He needed to wire money to his cousin, Daniel Trump but needed me to help.

So I said, 'Sure. A lot of my Russian visitors need financial help.'

So here's what I did today.

I rented a golf cart, bought a bag of new golf clubs, and sat in the parking lot of Robbie Jonsing Golf Course in Atlanta. I waited for a man to approach me. The code phrase for his greeting?

Do you wanna beat the bushes?

My coded reply?

I've got the clubs if you've got the balls.

His confirmation phrase?

Grab them by the pudding and let's go beat the bushes.

I couldn't make that up.

He directed me to the third dogleg on the right and headed straight into the rough. Then, out of bounds. Then, into the woods where he began beating the bushes with his driver.

No, he didn't use me to beat the bushes, He borrowed my new driver. Oh, Hello. I'm confused.

So I asked, Why are we doing this.

He replied with a straight face.

"This is the only way to beat the Bushes.'

Okay.

So are we looking for something?

'Yes, a toupee filled with a billion dollars.'

Well, that will never happen.

So I helped beat the bushes, kicked the bald man in the balls, hocked the golf cart instead of returning it, and sold the golf clubs on Craigslist.

Well, my ad was honest.

One set of golf clubs. Never used on the course. Used to beat bush, kick balls, and find billions of dollars hidden under a toupee. Bag included.

Some one named BoredUs bought the clubs and had me ship them to New Jersey, COD.

I don't make this stuff up. It just happens as I type.

Saturday, May 6, 2017

Things

If you're reading my posts, Remember:

I am not connected to any organized political group.

I consider myself Infonews.Russian.Cossack.altfact.altopinion.conspiracyalt.dumb.

I am a nut case.

I make things up so I can screw around on the Internet.

I love me some Republican meatloaf.

I don't think I'm rational but I ain't crazy.

I believe in comma's but not ...

Mostly, you'd have to be insane to believe what I say but check the links. Some are real.

If you don't like it, don't read it with your coffee.

Deal signed Guns on Campus law to help Karen Handel

Ossoff

He stands on the edge of victory in the 6th Congressional District. He's so close that Governor Nathan Deal signed into law provisions for students to carry guns to school.

That's right. I could return to college and carry any kind of gun to class. No teacher could stop me. No security or police. I could sleep in my class while using 'it for a pillow.'

I could load my car with as many guns as I wanted. All loaded. And, it someone saw my guns as I got out my book bag, no one would have a legal right to even ask me, do you have a concealed gun permit.

Stupid law. It would allow me to carry an arsenal, drive up to a student meeting, and open fire. All in the name of

ELECTING KAREN HANDEL.

Don't think so? I do. Handel is a college drop out type with only a high school diploma whose ambition runs as far as being President of the United States?

Don't think Handel could become President? Elect her to Congress. Get her the position as Speaker of the House, then she won't need to be elected.

'Guns for Karen,' the latest law passed during an election cycle to rally Republicans to the polls.


More on the reaction by police:

"Georgia's public university presidents and police chiefs were strongly opposed the bill. It now falls on them to figure out how to implement it before the next school year begins."

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

Casey Cagle lied, more than once, to the Security and Exchange Commission, SEC

Ask Mr. Lt. Gov., Lowell Stacy Cagle, about his qualifications for leading the development of Southern Heritage Bank and he'll say,

"I ran a prom dress and tuxedo rental company."

That's what he must say to be truthful and in compliance with his signed campaign disclosures.

But, he didn't say that.

He proudly said, 'I'm a business consultant for a corporation with a million shares of stock which was founded pretty much yesterday and won't exist for more than ninety days when I will abandon it."

Works for me. Worked for him. Fooled the Georgia Department of Banking and Finance. Fooled all the people investing in the bank. Well, it didn't fool those investors who knew Cagle never provided consulting services for a fee in his entire life. There's a list of those people. Most of them became members of the first Board of Directors, Southern Heritage Bank, Oakwood, Georgia.

You can read about that online with a little research through the SEC and federal government websites.

You can't get any information from Banking and Finance in Georgia. I know. I've asked.

You might ask why the under capitalized bank was allowed to open when other under capitalized banks were not.

Oh, that's right. Cagle had some sort of family connection between the bank and the state.

Just good old fashioned Southern corruption. Not a crime.

Monday, May 1, 2017

Casey Cagle changed his name

Lowell

His mother named him Lowell Stacy Cagle.

He became known as Casey because he couldn't pronounce Stacy, his girlish middle name.

He didn't want to be called Lowell, a great name with no meaning. Maybe he couldn't say Lowell either.

So Stacy became Casey who became wealthy, only after getting elected to the Georgia Senate.

I'll write some more about Mr. Cagle as his doomed run for Governor staggers us.

But, why did Hall County's favorite son open his greatest political campaign in Gwinnett County?

Thursday, April 20, 2017

Give my creation LIFE!

Keystone Pipeline

Dr. Frankenstein

Monsters

Yes, you can connect the dots. Private industry builds pipelines with fail-safe mechanisms equal to the protections in ... I don't know ... nuclear weapons and reactors.

Think Dr. Strangelove meets Fukushima Daiichi.

So when the Keystone Pipeline had a simple blowout, there must have been alarms blaring, sirens screaming, lights flashing ... which attracted a single 'passer-by' who said, "Look at all that fucking oil leaking out of that damn pipe!"

I don't make it up. I only spin it.

Read how the Keystone Pipe has been leaking like the Trump Whitehouse here.

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Thursday, April 6, 2017

Response to Republican repression

Recently, walking through the Oakwood Walmart, I ran into former State Representative, Carl Rogers. Like always, we talked politics. We shared a concern common to candidates and elected officials, voter participation.

Carl spent a lot of money in his campaigns for office. Lots of money. He regretted that spending, so I understood. He would have used it to pay people to go vote. He didn't care if they voted for him. He's not about buying votes or buying an election. No, he was clear on his point. He wanted people to be a part of government and every election.

Former Representative Rogers is a Republican but I'll stand by him being a good man.

His opinion matters and needed to be shared as Hall County, through its Board of Elections, declared ballot access and voter participation a requirement of democratic elections. Who would not stand with Carl on having people polled, not only on the selection of candidates, but on the issues also covered in referendums? Only Craig Lutz, the recent Republican appointee to the Elections Board and the Hall County Republican Party.

Unlike Rogers, Lutz finds democratic inclusion too expensive or 'fiscally irresponsible," his words. I won't rehash his opinion, as the Times covered his remarks. I will stand with Carl Rogers on the issue of government polling the populace through public elections and a free ballot.

The ballot belongs to the people, not to the taxpayer or a temporary government clerk, appointed by the back room leaders of one party, a party which fights only for freedom when freedom is cheap or the ultimate burden of liberty is borne on the backs of the poor.

Friday, March 3, 2017

Dylan Roof's supporters in Georgia

Last August, the Roswell Police Department fired an officer for flying the Confederate flag. On Monday, a Georgia judge sentenced two other flag-wavers to more than a decade of prison time each. Neither incident is related to protections under the First Amendment. But both incidents are related to the guns owned by Dylan Roof.

The Roswell police officer said that she didn’t realize that some found the flag to be offensive. By her incredible statement, she thinks that flying the flag doesn’t make a negative statement of any sort. She also said the flag had been flying from her house for over a year.

About a year places the flag on the house just about the time that racist Dylan Roof shot and killed nine people at Emmanuel African Methodist Episcopal church, home to the oldest black congregation in the Old South.

The judge, who sentenced the two far more aggressive flag-wavers to decades in prison, declared the duo committed a hate crime during their flag-waving and drinking convoy. The judge went one step further. He questioned why the 15 members of the flag-waving convoy weren’t arrested by police but driven away from the crime scene with the protection of the police. The judge said the flag-waving confrontations were connected to the Charleston shootings using the phrase, not “an accident.”

Both the unthinking police officer’s flag displays and the drunken, terrorist convoy celebrated the Dylan Roof's gunsmoke in Charleston, not the cannon smoke at the Battle of Fort Sumter.

Friday, February 17, 2017

We finished the Wall Press Conference

Almost live from the White House:

Republican President Donald Trump arrives riding a white Charger.

Fox News reports: The President rode in a white Dodge Charger driven by Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

CNN reports: The President was playing with a Tonka toy.

The President walks to the podium and leads the Pressroom reporters in prayer.

Fox News: The President humbled himself before the fake news reporters.

CNN: The President nodded off with his chin on his chest, snoring.

"Good afternoon, Members of the Press and all you others.

Today, I announce completion of the Wall with Mexico but did I mention my exceptional victory in the Electoral College? Most of you others haven't been reporting the truth but I had millions, millions I say, come to my after party. We won by the largest margin ever. I had 307 and half. That Green Party lady got none. Impressive victory.

The Wall. We started the wall right after calling Russian in December. I said, "I'm going to build the wall." Some of you don't remember and didn't report it. Putin has it on tape. So, while you losers were making up stories about Russian. And, Russia is fake. Fake. We built the Wall. That's right. THE Wall.

It's done and no one reported on it. Fake news will say I never built it. But, we did. I did. It's there. Duh!

We have pictures. I'm not going to share them. The fake news won't print them. Honestly. Honest.

My car is running like a well oiled machine. My driver says so. I don't have a mechanic. Don't need one. Nothing breaks while I'm around.

So, I won. It was big. I'm keeping my campaign promises. Counting my votes again. I got more votes than money. Did any one have any questions?"

Fox News reports: The legitimate President's new conference concluded quietly after a brief question and answer period.

CNN reports: As Trump left the pressroom, three reporters were shot with tazers by the Secret Service as Trump giggled like a girl.

Sunday, January 29, 2017

Trump Bans

Just released via Twitter for immediate retort:

By executive order, by the power invested in me in the unrigged election where I won the popular vote by 'millions,' the following words are banned.

Ray-ban

Bananas

Slurban

Ameban

Urban

Goban

All these bans are banned until the current Mulban ban is banned. Until then, all words ending in ban will be replaced with Trumpban.

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Trump at Work

From a co-worker: The women in the march were single, ugly, and never had a man and never will.

Being work, my response was mild. "Oh no. Most of them were housewives with nothing else to do."

Single Conservative men over the age of 25 with no girlfriends don't get sarcasm.

Trump's accomplishments on first weekend in office

Donald Trump just named MVP of NFC Championship Game.

Afterwards, he played 18 holes of golf and scored 19 holes in one.

Per White House Press release marked, "Alternative facts."

Trump at work

At work. Two of my co-workers told me the Clintons had closed down their 'foundation,' taken down the website, and were shredding documents. They're going to be in prison for the rest of their lives. Trump's keeping his promise to arrest her.

So, being work, my response was mild. 'Oh wow! No shit! You're not kidding me are you?'

No. The website has been taken down.

So I opened the website which is very against policy. 'Hey! It's still working!'

But it doesn't work. Trump has probably seized it to get donor lists. No one can donate now, especially the Saudi Princes.

So, I made a $25 donation while they watched.

Still unconvinced, they began showing me editorial headlines.

So I showed them Snopes.

So they showed me a FoxNews link.

So I read the content to them. On August 22, Bill Clinton announced the downsizing of the Global Initiative, which operates under the Foundation umbrella. All employees had been notified of the coming change to take effect, January 1, 2017.

I had a quiet night at work after that.

Friday, January 20, 2017

Education and the word on the street

In my street confrontation with my neighborhood friend, my friend bitched about how his wife, a teacher, was forced to work well into the night, usually in the basement while he slept.

He mentioned that all the Flowery Branch elite had fled the public schools leaving these kids that don't even know their daddies. He repeated that at least twice, These kids don't even know their daddies.

His suggestion? If we hear anyone talk about becoming a teacher, Beat them with a club. If they get up, beat them again. Keep beating them until they no longer want to be teachers.

Sounds like he wants to beat his wife, eh?

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Trump kills Big Bird. Cuts the legs off Kermit. Eats Ms. Piggy's bacon for breakfast.

Today, at 3.13 am, Trump killed the last of an endangered species, Big Bird. The bird went quietly. The last gasps too quiet to be heard over the roars of the crowds. Like any good New York City contract hit, the body and the blood on the street lasted longer than the funeral. Or, the unfulfilled promises offered only in youth.

Like all children, Big Bird started with ambitious thoughts of perspective parents that their child would be special. But, the long neck of the awkward big could not support parental ambitions. And, Trump gave the graceful shot of mercy using the all powerful pen and the smallest hands.

The new regimes spouting in the many States, denied the family any public ceremony by turning the fresh carcass over to private dogs. The fight for the last bone will be hidden from public and prying eyes.

We expect a New York chef soon will fry frog legs one evening with a nice Chianti and beans or prepare a formal Sunday brunch with bacon strips freshly hand sliced from world famous pork belly.

What appetite. Let it be satiated soon.

Monday, January 16, 2017

Trump deletes Mossad from his friends list

Moving the Mossad another step towards oblivion, President Elect Donald Trump deleted the Mossad from his friends list, proving nothing by saying nothing.

The Mossad did not respond, clearly proof of its non-person-hood.

Trump clearly won the next step of his on going dispute with intelligence communities called, Making Them Disappear.

Israel shuts down Mossad. No longer needs intelligence?

Donald Trump will announce the Israel intelligence agency, the Mossad, talked itself out of existence today.

The Mossad tweets will be posted at 3:17 am EST.

When asked which day, Trump replied. I'll tell you when.

Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Trump replaced with Russian double during sex party

It's over. Over. Done. Fini!

Unsubstantiated rumours from Helofaplace have not been confirmed as proving anything but if we believe the rumours never reported, ...

the Russians replaced Donald Trump during a sex party with a Cossack back in 1918 using a time machine invented by aliens!

Why 1918 and Trump and Cossacks? Huge hands! Yes, Huge Hands!

Lenin and Stalin, traveling in an alien time machine built to look just like the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile, not to be confused with the Anthony Weiner mobiles, visited several sex parties at a discotek owned by Samual W. Frank. While in Sam Frank's disco, bumping and grinding to McFadden & Whitehead's,' Ain't No Stopping Us Now,' Lenin said to Stalin,

There've been so many things that have held us down
But now it looks like things are finally comin' around, yeah
I know we've got a long long way to go, yeah
And where we'll end up.

... it should be a Russian sex party attended by some decadent real estate developers with small hands, orange hair, and huge debts.

Which is when Stalin reportedly said, 'Can you say Golden Showers?'

Stalin had his favorite Capitalistic pet dog, Peabody, fire up the Whackado machine for 2013.

Well, those details from 2013 will be published in an Elvis expose' entitled, 'Who Killed Elvis Pressley?' printed on the skins of Teaparty leaders.

But, Stalin purged Lenin into history and destroyed Peabody and the Whackado machine before returning to 1918 humming,

Shake your money maker
shake your money maker


Monday, January 9, 2017

Eric Braverman missing then found dead at Yale

Sadly, rumors about Eric Braverman, have been confirmed. He's teaching at Yale, which to conservatives is the same as missing in action or dead.

Snopes previously denied Braverman's murder by the Clinton death machine but failed to provide a walking, talking Braverman.

Which pretty much means that Braverman doesn't return phone calls, emails, or tweets. Therefore, Conservatives continue to say, 'He's really dead, killed by Clinton and buried next to Julian Assange.

For a short time, Conservatives thought Braverman had reached Russia in his desperate evasions of Clinton's invisible death teams.