We do still respect Walt Disney and all that he did to entertain us. But these Seven Dwarfs could not have entertained us even if Walt himself had staged the event.
Did everyone see Baldy the Dwarf? Eric Johnson looked like a man uncomfortable in his own skin ... or skin head. He has fallen from his lofty perch on billboards across the State. How can we not remember him decked out in a elegant business suit wearing red boxing gloves. Way back when he had hair and a dashing look. Now he resembles Dubose Porter. Twins seperated at birth?
What about the Dwarfs named Sleepy? There's a dedicated man. He promised not to sleep until he brought jobs to Georgia. He already had bags under his eyes. But he packed those bags way too soon.
How about the former SOS and her drive to create more small businesses? What shall we name her? Serfie? As in, "As governor, I will create more opportunities for boiled peanut stands, firewood sold by the stack, and an auto repair shop in every front yard." There's a good Republican slogan. "A car on concrete blocks in every front yard and boiled peanuts in every pot!" We'll all be serfs again with Serfie in the Mansion.
We could have named any of the Dwarfs, Motor Mouth. There were no slow, Southern draws in the group. Just those machine gun deliveries to get the word out. Even when silence might have been better than another wordy answer.
Poor Congressman Nathan Deal. We'd have to call him Smoothy after his slick performance in front of the cameras. He read his resume' with a straight face and the deep pride of a Great Man. "I was a small businessman." Yeah, with an exclusive State contract, protected by the Lt. Gov. K.C. Cagle. "I was a judge." Really? What was your biggest case, your O.J. Simpson murder trial? "I'm a Congressman!" We wouldn't know that, Mr. Deal, without being told. What is your signature legislation after nearly 20 years in the House of Representatives? What's your corruption rating compared to your success rate in authoring new laws? As one of the 435 most powerful people in the world, Mr. Deal, what's your legacy? Are you the Walt Disney of public servants?
Mickey Mouse rates higher. At least he intended to be funny and accomplished his goal.
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