Guns everywhere stance already kills innocent bystander

Self defense is a bitch if you've been drinking. It must happen like this:

Someone bumps your elbow just as you're lifting your beer bottle. Instead of hitting your mouth with gently rounded lips of a high quality beer bottle, your stick your nose in beer. Snorting warm beer and rich beer foam, you turn quickly to identify the careless lout who spilled three cents worth of your $3.75 beer.

Following standard Cowboy bar protocol, you snarl, "Watch it, buddy!"

Robert DeNiro spins around with a cocky look and says, "You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talkin' to? You talkin' to me? Well I'm the only one here. Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?"

Then, things move outside for more theatre and weak insults. Insults outside bars used to be so robust and nearly lethal in the days before the Guns Everywhere Law. Since then, no one really cares to whip out a cutting 'Yo Moma' quip. Now it's whip out the semi-auto 9 mm with 17 shot capacity, a bayonet mounted on the accessory rail.

Yes. A bayonet not a laser sight. Only a wuss uses a laser sight in a bar shooting.

Triggers are gently massaged. Steely eyed combatants close one steely eye to save their night vision and exchange salvoes.

Now here's the next set of rules, if you're wounded but standing, you stagger around in front of the onlookers saying, 'He shot me. Look. I'm shot. Why did he have to do that?'

If you're on the ground, wounded or not, shout, 'Help me up. I'm going to kill that guy who killed me before I die. I swear.'

If you're unwounded and still standing after your 17 shots, Run! Run like hell you coward because you've probably shot 17 innocent people killing at least one.

Story in the AJC on the most recent bar fight turned deadly for the innocent at this link, AJC